First off, I would like to say that all of these tips on how to make your long distance relationship work are from my very own personal experience. They have helped me in my current long distance relationship and I hope these tips will become useful to yours as well!
As a woman, I know how we can be. We have trust issues, we can be territorial, even become a little “smothering” when it comes to a guy we really like. In a long distance relationship, it is difficult to keep tabs on your significant other. Where they’re at, what they’re doing, why haven’t they called at the usual time today etc.
WE ALL KNOW TRUST IS ONE OF THE THINGS THAT ARE MOST IMPORTANT YOU HAVE TO HAVE TRUST IN A RELATIONSHIP!!
Now let’s start..
Here are some things I have learned a long the way, with being in a long distance relationship and how mine worked!
1. JESUS HAS TO BE THE CENTER. no if’s and’s or but’s about it! With Christ being the center of my relationship, it has been majorly successful! Even in the distance. This is the solid foundation, if you don’t have Jesus in your relationship, it will automatically crumble to pieces.
2.LEARN BALANCE. You guys aren’t like some couples who can see each other whenever, any time of the day. So, apart from being in a relationship, you have your own life. Don’t forget though, you have to learn how to balance your lifestyles out so you can always make time for each other.
3. COMMUNICATION. My boyfriend is the lead in the worship band at his church. He works two jobs, and is always busy. However, one thing he never fails to do is to make sure he communicates with me. Something simple as, an “I miss you text.” Or him letting me know what he’s doing and why he probably won’t be able to talk as much that day due to his busy and demanding schedule. I must admit this is one of the most challenging things any relationship deals with, whether long distance or not. When you don’t communicate, it causes a distance emotionally, and feelings start to deflate. With being in a long distance relationship, communication is basically all you have that keeps the relationship together. You have to let your significant other know when you’re upset, hurting, mad, stressed. When you’re feeling unappreciated, unloved, or just don’t feel like they care. Let them know, they can’t read your mind, ALWAYS COMMUNICATE.
4. COMPROMISE. Now I rarely ever use this word because people take this word and run with it. When I say compromise I mean as in. If he likes to sit and play the video games for hours, or you want two kids but he wants three. You both should work together, and make the relationship 50/50. Maybe you might have to bend a little and so does he, to make it even and make the relationship balanced. As far as your beliefs, you both should be on one accord. My boyfriend and I are both sold out for Jesus, there is no compromise. He is not “some what” saved, or only saved on certain days. Our purpose in life is to fully live for Jesus, no exceptions. We live to totally serve Him. There is no compromising that. My boyfriend and I are on the same page when it comes to our faith in Jesus! Simple.
5. BE SPONTANEOUS. I like it when my significant other sends me voice messages like, “I love you beautiful.” I’m always shocked to wake up on certain mornings to his voice messages, it let’s me know he’s thinking of me, and his good morning texts are always a joy to read. I also recommend sending letters to him. Whether it be via email, or post mail. Always show him you appreciate him. He should definitely be doing the same.
6. TRY NEW THINGS. Haven’t skyped yet? I suggest you do that. Skype, Oovoo, Facetime, are great resources to chat with eachother face to face over the computer. Being that you guys never get to see each other as much being so far apart. When you can physically see their smile, hear their voice or see their laugh. It makes the bond stronger, as if you are together.
7. ALWAYS ASK QUESTIONS. Ask how their day was, or how’d they sleep. Always make good conversation by showing them how much you want to know more about them. Also, it shows interest. You are interested in them, SHOW IT.
8. TELL HIM YOU LOVE AND APPRECIATE HIM OFTEN. Another example. I always tell my boyfriend that I love him and appreciate him. One day, I told him I appreciate him, and he tells me how much he loves hearing that. Just like we want to know we’re being appreciated, guys want to know that as well. Always tell them.
9. BE SUPPORTIVE. Always. Your guy is studying hard in school and he gets a high grade on an exam, tell him how proud you are of him. He got a promotion on his job, or went to another level in his video game. Nothing he accomplish should be stupid to you. Appreciate his persistence and determination.. It speaks volumes about his character.
10. PRAYER. Pray together. It works! When things are getting tough, and things aren’t looking like it’ll last. Talk it out, and pray about it. God always has the answer and he will never allow you to go through something alone. He is always right there! Prayer changes things!
Hope these tips helped. Let me know if you got anything out of this @ ibpmovement.gmail.com